Thursday, December 23, 2004

Tis The Day Before Christmas....

....when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. Unless you're in work with 400 computers (300 working), plenty of mice there. Bastard.

In work on Christmas Eve, working 8 till 8 as well. Git. Well at least there's the piss up afterwards at me local, so I can at least unwind a bit tonight anyroads. It's been an odd buildup to Christmas this year. Odd for the simple reason that when it's going to hit the actual day tomorrow, that it'll be gone before we know it. All the preparations, all the running about through traffic to buy last minute prezzies, getting the shopping in ready for the big day, and when it turns up we'll be likely sitting down and drinking Carling while watching re-runs of films we half-enjoyed 3 years ago. Fuck, I forgot to buy Carling.

As I started saying in yesterday's post, Christmas is a religious holiday which is meant to represent the Birth Of Christ. But recently this has been blown out of proportion by commercialisation and greedy kids; everyone wants everything, and the kids and companies live off each other for it. 99% of the kids couldn't give a flying fuck who Jesus Christ is (some think it's an insult only to say that), and are just desperate for that present which the parents most probs haven't bought them anyway. Unless you're names Brooklyn Beckham and you wanted a £22,000 Hummer for Christmas that is. Cucky lunt. There again, I was the same when I was a kiddie, didn't give a fuck about the Queen's speech or the Jesus story, and just concernatrated on getting as many Transformers as possible. Christ, they're still going strong aren't they? So is He-Man and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles too (or Hero Turtles if you're in lame as fuck U.K.); both have shite loads of stuff out at the mo and back on TV too. Feck, even Battlestar Galactica has made a try at a comeback. But failed lol. That's because Face from the A-Team wasn't on it.

Whatever happened to Buck Rogers? He kicked ass, even if they did do a crap disco bit in the Buck Rogers movie (Buck teaching them to Disco in the 25th Century, fecking comical).

"Bidi bidi bidi Fuck you Buck!"

Twiggy was far better than Buck in this, and took no shit. He was the 70's equivalent of Ice T, and was gansta tripping over Wilma's ass. Ok, maybe that was a porn film, or a "Christmas Special", I dunno. Still though, Twiggy was pimping his ho's while Buck was out "saving the universe", or killing special effects.

Anyhows, I found out what our members of staff do when they aren't stuck in work at most of the silly hours; they end up in the 24 hour Tescos. Where I saw about 20 members of staff last night shopping. Talk about unsociable fecking hours with the job. I was in Tescos until 11 last night because that was the only time I had available to shop before Christmas. Considering that it was so late, it was a fucking nighmare. The staff were trying to fill up the shelves, while blocking up half of the aisles with the big kick-ass trolleys full of gumph, while we had to try and negotiate around. I almost smacked 6 grannies. What is it about shopping in a supermarket that makes me so fucking infuriated? Is it the fact that you can never find anything? The fact that the missus makes you turn a full trolley around to go down one aisle, then as you start moving down the aisle, makes a quick U-Turn and heads down the next one, leaving you stuck betwen 2 grannies in No-Man's Land? Or is it the fact that there are ALWAYS PEOPLE IN THE FUCKING WAY? Yeah, I think that's the one. You're pushing 1/2 a tonne of shopping about on something with 3 working wheels, and some ignorant fecker always steps out in the way. I've taken the approach of not stopping now, and have knocked over a small child lol. It's also the way in which people glare at you if they've stood in the way, and wonder why you've become mightily pissed at them.

BUT...it's 90% of the time the WOMEN who do this, not the men. We've been designated the insufferable bastards who've got to push the basket of doom to where-ever they order us, even when they direct us down the wrong aisle, them blame us for taking a minute to turn around. It's WOMEN who walk in front of us while we're desperately trying to control the Reliant Robin impersonator, then glare at us as if we've just invaded Poland. And it's WOMEN who scrutinise the receipts afterwards, and ask us to drive 5 miles back to argue about being overcharged 20p for the tins of beans, when it'll cost about a pound in petrol to get there and back again.

Leave shopping to the women, I say.

Also, check this out; Banned-Aid 20 - parody video of the new Band Aid vid, absolutely comical.

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